


The Greatest Hot Dog In All The Land

by afteriwake



Series: Stuff Of Improbable Legends [30]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Vampire Academy Series - Richelle Mead
Genre: Awesome Kirk, Caring Kirk, Cravings, F/M, Food, Honeymoon, Honeymoon Gifts, Hungry Rose, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Married Rose Hathaway/James T. Kirk, New York City, POV Rose, Roleplay Logs, Rose is a Bottomless Pit, Snacks & Snack Food, Surprises, hot dogs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-05-27 09:00:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6278062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kirk surprises Rose one morning while they're on the part of their honeymoon in New York, telling her they're going to run down a list of the eighteen best hot dog stands in New York City, and Rose remembers that it's reasons like this why she's glad she married him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Greatest Hot Dog In All The Land

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sideofrawr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sideofrawr/gifts).



> This was inspired by a post that **sideofrawr** made in game where Rose posted [this picture](http://i.imgur.com/JUAUEJb.jpg) while Kirk and Rose were on the New York portion of their honeymoon, and then I stumbled across [this post](http://ny.eater.com/maps/best-hot-dogs-new-york-classic) after she asked for Rose POV fic (as well as Kirk POV fic) of them on their honeymoon. I figured she'd enjoy this. Any place where they didn't eat I either couldn't find a menu for or I couldn't tell if it was in business or not.

“I have a surprise for you.”

Rose raised her eyebrow at her husband. Not that she didn’t love surprises from her husband, she did. But he had a habit of going…well, over the top. There was the suite, there was the fact he’d booked them a ten day cruise, there was so much about this last minute honeymoon he was pulling out all the stops for. She was a bit worried about what he had up his sleeve. And now there was the fact it was nine o’clock in the morning and she’d been sleeping and he’d managed to get up, get dressed and she hadn’t even noticed and he was grinning at her with the wide kinda dopey grin on his face she loved.

She wasn’t sure whether she should be worried or excited.

She sat up and looked at him, rubbing at her eyes slightly. “Is it a good surprise?” she asked.

“It’s a ‘don’t plan on eating anything other than New York hot dogs all day’ kind of surprise,” he said.

Her eyes widened slightly. “What?”

He sat on the bed near her, settling his hand on her thigh on top of the comforter. “I know you love your food. And the fact we’re in New York got me thinking. There was a post on a website of these eighteen hot dog stands and shops that are supposed to have the best hot dogs in the whole city.” He paused. “Well, sixteen here in New York and one in Jersey. I _think_ one of them is closed down, but I’m not sure. But I thought that might be a good way of spending the day. We can skip the one in New Jersey, though.”

“Or we can do that another day,” she said.

“That works too.”

She felt a wide grin spread on her face as she motioned for him to lean forward. He did, and she kissed him softly. “Gimmie a few minutes to get showered and dressed and we can go. Are we doing it in order?”

He nodded. “Best to worst or worst to best?”

She tilted her head back and forth. “Worst to best,” she said. “Are we doing cabs?”

“Nope. I got us a car for the day. A nice one.”

“Oooh, I knew there was a reason I married you,” she teased. She gave him another kiss and then threw back the covers, getting out of bed. This was going to be fun.

  
**San Antonio Bakery 2**  
New York, NY  
_Completo_   


Rose noticed there were a few things on the menu that looked interesting, like the empanadas de pino and the lomito queso, which she thought might taste tasty with avocado, but she was drawn straight to the completo. A hot dog topped with sauerkraut, which she found out was called "churcrut" in Chile, tomatoes, avocado and mayonnaise. It sounded weird but also sounded delicious. She wondered if she could talk Kirk into trying one but he was already eyeing the empanada de queso al horno and an espresso. “Didn't you eat already?” she asked as they got their food and he carried it to a table.

He shook his head. “I figured even if I'm not eating hot dogs I'm going to be trying stuff from everywhere,” he said. “Should probably start on an empty stomach.”

“Ah,” she said. Once they were sitting down she reached over for the hot dog. 

He waited and watched her take a bite. “Well?” he asked before he picked up his empanada.

She swallowed. “Can you get me three more?”

  
**Nathan's Famous**  
Brooklyn, NY  
_Pretzel Dog_   


Three hot dogs had barely done anything. She was still starving by the time they got to Nathan’s Famous. She was starting to think she should have had something else to eat. But this was supposed to be a good hot dog joint. A franchise. Lots of good choices. So she could have her pick of things.

She got inside and looked at the menu. There were a few things that looked appealing, yeah, but…she could see why it was low on the list. It was actually the stuff _aside_ from the hot dogs that looked really good, particularly the bacon ranch fries. She really missed ranch. Like, really _really_ missed it. She was wondering if they’d let her have a side of ranch with whatever she ordered. But that would probably ruin the taste of the hot dog and then it wouldn’t be a _true_ New York hot dog.

But she could always come back later.

She looked over her choices and settled on a pretzel dog and old-fashioned orangeade. She hadn’t gotten anything to drink at the other place and she was thirsty. Kirk got a bowl of Manhattan clam chowder and then they settled in to eat. She had to admit it wasn’t _bad_ , but it really could have done with the ranch. Hopefully the next place was better…

  
**Fulton Hot Dog King**  
Brooklyn, NY  
_Nothing_   


She studied the menu and frowned. “I don’t see hot dogs on the menu,” she said. “I mean, I see a bunch of other stuff, but…no hot dogs.”

Kirk looked around. “Well, do you want something else?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Not really. We have, what, sixteen places total to hit today? And we’ve only been to two? Let’s focus on the rest, okay?”

“Okay.”

  
**Rosie's Hot Dog Truck**  
Brooklyn, NY  
_Chiwawa Dog_   


It took a little while to find the truck, but when she found it she thought she might have died and gone to heaven. They didn’t just have hot dogs, she realized; they had hamburgers and flautas too. She was almost torn as to what to get because really, _everything_ seemed so good. But Kirk said he’d get some flautas and he’d share, and the guy in charge of the truck highly recommended the Chiwawa dog, a crisp-skinned frank piled with cheese, tomatoes, cilantro, crema, and salsa verde. She had to admit, the idea of it made her salivate.

She got two and she and Kirk took them a little ways away from the truck. She _might_ let him have a bite, depending on if she liked it as much as she thought she was going to. He took a bite of one of his flautas and then nodded. “Okay, New Orleans needs one of these food trucks,” he said.

She took a bite of the hot dog and then moaned. “Or else I need to convince Molly to bring me here daily,” she said when she swallowed. She thought for a moment, then offered Kirk a bite. He took it, then nodded. “Next time we get wishes and we aren’t being selfless, I swear, one of us better wish for teleportation.”

“Oh yeah,” he said with a nod. “Definitely.”

  
**Guacuco Hot Dogs**  
Brooklyn, NY  
_Picante_   


By the time they got to Guacuco she was feeling the craving for something…spicy. So when she saw the Picante hot dog on the menu her eyes lit up and she got a gleam. Bacon, fried egg, jalapenos, spicy pepper, chopped onions, cabbage, carrots, crispy chips, edam cheese, cream cheese and sauces on an all-beef frank. Her husband knew her well, because he just shook his head and asked “How many Picantes do you want?”

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Three?” she asked. He nodded and placed the order for her, with passion fruit juice just in case. She raised an eyebrow at his choice of food for him. “Benji Benji?”

“Where else am I ever going to get to try a hamburger that's breathe in beef, pork chop, chicken breast, bacon, ham, fried egg, avocado, tomato, lettuce, onions and sauces all at once?” he asked.

“Sure you're not the pregnant one?”

“Hey, I was pregnant once,” he said. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. They waited for their food, and once it was done they took it and settled in to eat. It was a messy hot dog, but she realized so far, _this_ was her favorite. Kirk looked at her and shook her head. “I’ll figure out how to make you one of these at home, promise.”

“Thanks, hun.”

  
**Crif Dogs**  
Brooklyn, NY  
_John-John Deragon, Spicy Redneck, Lil Ma, Philly Tubesteak & Morning Jersey _   


She might have died and gone to Heaven.

Kirk took one look at her face when she saw the signature dogs and groaned. Almost none of the combinations that caught her fancy interested him _at all_ but they all seemed to hit some unknown pregnancy craving. The John-John Deragon had cream cheese, scallions, bacon and everything bagel seeds; the Spicy Redneck had bacon, chili, cole slaw and jalapeños; the Philly Tubesteak had cheese, sautéed onions and jalapeños; the Morning Jersey was wrapped in ham and had melted cheese and a fried egg; and the piece de resistance was the Lil Ma, which was a bacon wrapped frank with peanut butter, pickles and crushed potato chips.

Like she said, Heaven.

He dutifully ordered her one of everything, with a few additions to the Philly Tubesteak, and waited while she took a moment to take a picture of her Philly Tubesteak creation for the boards. “I’m surprised you haven’t been spamming them all day,” Kirk said in an amused tone.

“Yeah, well, some of the stuff I’ve had would gross people out,” she said. He tried not to make disgusted faces as she ate each and every one of her hot dogs, a look of ecstasy on her face as she enjoyed each and every bite. 

He ate his much plainer hot dogs, finishing earlier than she did, and waited until she was done. When she finished, he looked over at her. “Do you want more?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No, I’m good,” she said.

“I’m surprised,” he said, leaning back in his chair.

“But we’re coming back every day till we get on that cruise,” she said. “I’m trying _all_ of them.”

He grinned and shook his head. “How’d I guess?”

  
**Panya Bakery**  
New York, NY  
_Sausage Roll_   


There was only one thing on the menu that resembled a hot dog, the sausage roll, but she saw it had wasabi and that interested her. She ordered one while Kirk ordered quite a few other things. She grinned at that. She knew he had a fondness for baked goods and as she couldn’t bake worth a damn and this was the first time they’d been in a bakery all day it was fun to watch him stock up.

“You’re not going to eat all this right now, are you?” she asked, grinning. 

He shook his head. “Not that the food at The Grand is _bad_ , but this place smells amazing and I just kind of want to stuff my face?”

She laughed and then shook her head. “You’re kind of cute, you know that.”

“Yeah, well, unlike you I won’t deny it,” he said with a grin. He got his purchases together as she took her sausage roll and he watched her take a bite. “Wasabi spicy enough?”

She nodded, shutting her eyes as she savored it. “Normally I don’t like baked hot dogs but this is actually really good,” she said. "I kind of want to get another one for the road.” She paused. “And maybe one of those potato croquette pans, too.”

Kirk raised an eyebrow. “Something non-hot dog?”

“Variety is the spice of life.”

  
**Katz's Delicatessen**  
New York, NY  
_Two Knockwurst With Beans, Bread And Pickles_   


“Fuck, the line is _insane_ ,” she said, her eyes wide as they got to the delicatessen.

Kirk grinned and took her hand, shaking his head. “They’re waiting for pastrami or corned beef. We get to cut ahead since we’re getting hot dogs,” he said. “Or at least you are.”

“What are you getting?” she asked.

“Two knockwurst with beans, bread and pickles,” she said.

She bit her lip. _Technically,_ it wasn’t a New York hot dog but she watched someone behind the counter prepare it and it _really_ looked good. “I know I’m supposed to be having New York hot dogs, but…”

“You can always make an exception,” he said, his grin getting wider. “I won’t say a word.” They made it up to the counter and he placed their order, two orders of two knockwursts with beans. 

She watched the line for the deli meats move slowly but they got served much more quickly, and when they finally got to eat she shut her eyes. “Oh, this is delicious,” she said. “Why can’t we have delis like this in New Orleans?”

“Because we have Creole and Cajun food instead,” he said. “Would you rather give up Coop’s for this?”

She got a pained look on her face. “That’s a mean question. Don’t make me choose.” She took another bite. “No, I guess not. But maybe we can pay someone to get us stuff like this more often.”

“Maybe.”

  
**Le District**  
New York, NY  
_Nothing_   


“I am so lost,” she said.

“I am too,” he replied. “I tried to look up the place and there’s a bunch of different locations and I can tell it’s a restaurant, but maybe a bar, too? I don’t think they just sell hot dogs.”

Rose bit her lip for a moment, tilting her head. They’d been to eight places, struck out on one, and still had seven more to go to. And if this was a fancy restaurant and not a stand or a walk in joint or something, they might need a reservation. “Skip it and try again tomorrow, maybe?” she suggested.

“That sounds like a good idea,” he said with a nod. He moved a hand to the small of her back to guide her back to the waiting car. “Shall we?”

  
**The Rusty Knot**  
New York, NY  
_Pretzel Dog_   


She was disappointed that the only hot dog they had on the menu was a pretzel dog, considering she’d already had one today, until she saw it. It was bigger, for one thing, and the pretzel part looked better, and it was just…well, _better_. Even Kirk had gotten one to try, and he’d only had hot dogs when absolutely necessary. Of course, this was a bar and lucky him, he was getting a beer, too. Beer needed salty food, so salty food meant pretzel dog.

Logic, she had it.

“I’m getting weird looks being in here,” she said.

“Not from the wait staff,” he said. “not once you explained they supposedly had one of the best hot dogs in New York City and you had a wicked craving. They grinned at you like mad.”

“True,” she said, tilting her head back and forth. “And the virgin mai tai isn’t so bad. Kinda nice to have a fruity drink even if it _is_ missing the booze. You better leave a good tip.”

“I’ll leave a great tip, especially since I think you’re going to get another one of those pretzel dogs?”

“Maybe. But I’m _definitely_ getting two more virgin mai tais, at least.”

He chuckled. “Then I’ll leave a _really_ nice tip.”

  
**Chelsea Papaya**  
New York, NY  
_Chili Cheese Sausage Dog & Corn Dog_   


She wanted to try something different. Not a vegetarian hot dog or a chicken or turkey dog. The idea of those turned her stomach. But when they got to Chelsea Papaya she saw it. She saw exactly what she wanted to try. But at the same time, she saw the sausage dog with the chili and cheese. She was torn.

She was biting her lip as she stared at the menu. Kirk came up behind her and slid his arms around her. “Tough choices?”

She nodded. “Torn between the chili cheese sausage dog and the corn dog,” she said.

“Go for both,” he said, pressing a kiss in her hair. “You eat a whole lot because of your physiology and because of the twins, and we can walk around a little bit before we go to the next place. Maybe take a trip to Central Park or something?”

“Try an inferior hot dog vendor?” she asked.

“And ruin the experience?” he asked, sounding mock scandalized. She chuckled and swatted at his hands clasped on her abdomen. “Okay, fine. Hopefully they’re good.”

“Oh, I think they will be,” he said. And…he was right. They were magnificent.

  
**The Cannibal Beer & Butcher**  
New York, NY  
_Cannibal Dogs 2.0_   


“Fifteen bucks for a hot dog?” Rose asked, her jaw dropping. She looked over at Kirk. He’d told her what the one this restaurant was known for was, and when he mentioned it was spicy, with spicy tripe chili, scallion and Chinese mustard she’d thought it was right up her alley. And she’d expected it to be kinda pricey, but… _fifteen bucks_?

He shrugged. “If you like it, it’ll be worth it.

She shook her head. “You know, you’ve spent a small fortune today on hot dogs for me,” she said. “Not counting the food you bought for yourself.”

“But you’re enjoying yourself, right?” he asked, just a tiny bit of hesitation in his voice.

She reached over for his hand. Of course she was enjoying herself. It involved eating, one of her favorite things to do. They were exploring New York, and not just the touristy trap places. They’d gotten to go to some really cool places. They were laughing and having a great time. She was having a blast. And it was something that meant a lot because it showed he’d thought about her and what she’d like and…well, it just showed he loved her. And damn it, it was things like this that had caused her to fall in love with him in the first place, after all. “So far it’s one of the best days we’ve spent together,” she said with a grin. “Promise.” And when she got a grin back, she felt better.

  
**Liebman's Kosher Deli**  
Bronx, NY  
_Hot Dog Topped With Potato Salad_   


Kirk looked like he was getting tired of hot dogs, poor guy. He wasn’t eating near as many as she was, but maybe it was just the sight or smell of them, she wasn’t sure. But she was enjoying their culinary adventure. They were getting to see all sorts of parts of New York, and she was enjoying all sorts of great hot dogs, even if there were a few misses among the hits.

This little deli was kind of hidden away but she liked it. It wasn’t as insanely packed as Katz’s, but it was busy. She’d never really tried anything kosher before, and she was intrigued that it might be really different tasting, but she could see why it had been so highly ranked. It was so good, so very very good.

She’d gotten her husband to order a second one and he’d gotten himself an bowl of their Old Fashioned Chicken Soup with noodles and matzah ball and a potato pancake with applesauce. She had to admit, the potato pancake looked good. She took a bite of her second hot dog. “Can you get me one of those, too?” she asked.

“The potato pancake?” he asked. She nodded. “Sure.” He turned, then looked back at her. “If we do something like this tomorrow, are you going to do hot dogs or other stuff?”

“Not sure yet,” she said. “I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hot dogs.”

“We’ll see.”

  
**Épicerie Boulud**  
New York, NY  
_Nothing_   


They stood inside the shop at Lincoln Center and looked around. It looked more like a shop for good food than a place to get hot dogs. Her husband had the gleam in his eye that she’d had almost all day, she could see. She almost felt bad that they didn’t seem to have the menu item that he’d seen on the list he’d found, as far as they could tell. “Are you disappointed?” she asked.

“Just that they don’t have the item,” he said. “Unless you want to leave right now…”

She laughed softly and shook her head. “Go ahead, nerd. Go shop to your heart’s content. We only have two more places to go to anyway.”

He kissed her quickly. “This is why I love you so much.”

“I’ll remember that when you tell me you never want to see another hot dog in your life.”

“We’ll see who gets tired of them first.”

  
**Gray's Papaya**  
New York, NY  
_Recession Special_   


She shouldn’t have wanted a whole lot more to eat but damn it, she was like a walking bottomless pit. After all the weird and out there hot dogs she’d tried, by the end of the day, she figured at the end of the day she should just try a regular, classic New York hot dog from the best of the best. And Gray’s Papaya had a reputation. They had the simple hot dogs. Nothing fancy. She had her two with a lot of relish, some spicy brown mustard and the drink she picked for the Recession Special was the papaya juice. They had to stand up to eat it but damn, was it worth it.

“Okay, these are damn good,” she said, nodding her head. “ _Damn_ good. I can see why this place has the rep it has.”

“And the line it has,” Kirk said with a nod.

“Yeah, that too,” she said with a grin. She took another bite. “You said we still have one more to try?”

He nodded. “Yup. Do you want to give up? Tired of hot dogs?”

“Me? Tired of hot dogs?” she scoffed. “Fat chance. Especially since we’re in New York. I just want to know how they’re going to top _this_.”

“Guess we’ll have to find out.”

  
**Bark Hot Dogs**  
New York, NY  
_Classic Dog_   


They made it to Bark Hot Dog and she ordered a Classic Dog to start with, to properly compare it to Gray’s Papaya, loading it up with the simple condiments: NYC onion, little dash of diced red onion, some of the Sir Kensington's Spicy Brown mustard and some of the ketchup, and a little of the sweet pepper relish since they didn't have pickle. “Now this looks more or less like a classic New York hot dog. This won’t give people nightmares with what I put in my stomach,” she said. She took a bite and nodded, moaning slightly while she ate. “I can see why people say they’re the best.”

“So you think they’re the best?” he asked, taking a bite of his own food.

“There were so many that were good,” she said. “I think we’ll have to come back when I’m not pregnant and don’t have weird cravings, because right now, Crif Dogs kinda has everyone beat.”

He chuckled. “Then maybe on our one year anniversary we can come back and do this all over again.”

She beamed at him. “It’s a date.”


End file.
